You Rock My World
by xxPanda-chan
Summary: A fifteen year old retired ANBU captain is kidnapped. This is the story of Hatake Kaori and her adventures with the Akatsuki.
1. Chapter 1

I woke up with my hands tied behind my back, slumped in a chair. For a few moments, confusion clouded my vision. Then my memories came back, and I sat up, looking at the Akatsuki leader sitting across from me.

"Hatake Kaori, a normal captive of the Akatsuki would normally be dead. Yet your strength and knowledge have changed your fate. Youngest to graduate the Konoha Academy, youngest leader of the Anbu and retired for two years from the services at only 15, I ask you to consider joining our group. The alternative choice is death."

My quick thinking kicked in, and before he could give me the chance to consider, I had found an alternative of my own. "May I propose my own alternative?" His nod was slow, letting me go on. "I work as a sort of maid for your organization, not as an actual member. I can cook and clean, and heal most injuries."

His expression, or what I could see of it, was contemplative. Then, a blonde haired boy ran in, his ponytail uneven and sweat running down his face from running. Before he could say a word, the leader spoke.

"Alright, you may act as a maid for the Akatsuki. As we lack an extra room at the moment, I'm sure Deidara wouldn't mind sharing his with you, as he was tardy for this important meeting. You may go with him. New clothes will be provided for you in the morning, but for now, you should get some sleep."

My hands were instantly untied, my body aching as I stood up. I faced the members of the organization I had been brought up to hate, my posture straight and eyes calm.

"I'm Hatake Kaori, but I'm sure you all knew that," I stated, starting the introductions.

"Hoshigaki Kisame." His skin was blue, and I knew I had heard the name before. He had been one of the seven swordsmen of the Mist.

"Uchiha Itachi." I stared at my former rival. He had barely changed, his hair still black and eyes still cold. "It's nice to see you again, Kaori-chan."

"As it is to see you, Itachi-kun. The village hasn't been the same without our rivalry."

The other members looked slightly confused at our knowledge of each other. Yawning slightly, I urged them to continue introductions.

"Sasori." The red-haired boy reminded me of Gaara, and I decided he was probably from the Sand village also.

"Hidan." Light hair slicked back, and a huge scythe, I remembered the fight from earlier which had resulted in my capture.

"Kakuzu. You provided a better fight than I expected in the desert, Kaori-chan." His green eyes were full of respect.

"Hi! I'm Tobi-kun! It's nice to meet you, Kaori-chan!" The orange-masked man caused me to giggle, his energy astounding.

"Konan. It'll be nice to have another girl in the Akatsuki." Her blue hair had a white paper flower in it.

"Zetsu." One half black, one half white, his large venus fly-trap extensions were slightly intimidating.

"Deidara, un. Come with me, I suppose I'll lead you to my room."

He turned on his heel and walked forward, and I analyzed the members one last time before following him down a long hallway. I pushed some of my snow-white hair out of her face, lengthening my strides to catch up with the blonde. Each door we passed had the kanji for the member's name on it. I was so distracted that I nearly ran into Deidara as he stopped, turning as he opened the door.

"Don't touch my desk, un. And the bathroom is the door on the right."

"I won't; I respect your belongings. And may I borrow some clothes?" I asked as a second thought, looking down at my ripped and bloody attire. He just sighed, going over to a dresser and pulling out a pair of dark pants and a t-shirt, throwing them at me as I walked into the bathroom.

I walked out ten minutes later to see him sculpting a small bird. His gaze turned to me, and he smiled slightly.

"Those clothes are a little big on you, un."

I laughed in response, still looking at the creature by his hands. "That's a cute bird. Do you sculpt often?"

"Yes, un. It's part of my jutsu. I'll tell you about it in the morning. Now, about sleeping arrangements-"

"We could share the bed. I wouldn't want to sleep on the floor or wish that upon you. And I trust you not to pull any stunts."

"Well... I suppose that would be fine, un."


	2. Chapter 2

I woke up the next morning, warmth surrounding me. Then I realized what position I was in.

My head was lying on Deidara's chest, my arm across his pale stomach as his arm wrapped around my skinny waist. It took all my strength not to jump up, slowly sliding off the bed to let the boy sleep some more. A deep blush marked my face, and I put my hair into a ponytail as I ran to the kitchen, remembering its location from passing it the night before. A traditional breakfast of miso soup and steamed rice was finished just as Kisame walked in, Itachi behind him.

"Good morning, beautiful. That smells delicious," Kisame stated in a goofy tone.

"Thank you, fish-boy. I'm just doing my job. Good morning, Itachi."

"Fish-boy? Really?" Kisame stated grumpily, his happy mood decreasing greatly.

"Well, that's what you look like," Kakuzu said, sliding into the room. "Breakfast smells marvelous, Kaori-chan."

"I agree, it's fucking wonderful." Of course, Hidan was right behind his partner.

Tobi ran in, hugging my waist from behind as I poured the soup into bowls.

"Tobi-kun already thinks Kaori-chan is a great cook! Good morning Kaori-chan!"

I just laughed as a response, continuing my task as Konan, Leader-sama, and Deidara walked in. Sasori followed behind, and Zetsu came in last. I sat the last bowl down onto the table and turned to the plant-like member, who looked at his soup as if it was a poison.

"Is anything wrong, Zetsu-san?'' I worried, wondering what I had done wrong.

"This smells delicious, **I'm a carnivore.**" His two voices disturbed me, the white half's gentle as the black's was violent.

"Oh! I'm so sorry! Here," I said, rushing to the refrigerator and pulling out a piece of meat. "How would you like it done?"

"**Just hand it to me**, thank you, Kaori-chan."

"Kaori, would you like to go into a nearby village and buy some clothing? I'm sure Deidara would love to escort you," Leader-sama asked kindly, looking at me from his bowl.

"I would love to, Leader-sama, thank you. I can wash the dishes and be ready in about an hour."

"No need, Tobi usually washes the dishes. You can go get ready as soon as you finish your breakfast," he said, standing up. "And you may call me Pein-sama."

He disappeared into the hallway, and I just looked at the other members, who seemed shocked. "What's wrong? Is the soup not good enough? I can fix something else-"

"Pein-sama rarely lets people call him that, especially after he's only known them for a day," Deidara interrupted me, answering my question for me. "And don't worry, you're the best cook we've ever had, and this is the best breakfast I personally have ever had."

Everyone agreed, except Sasori, who wasn't eating. Intrigued, I turned to him.

"Sasori-san, why aren't you eating? Do you have a special diet like Zetsu-san?"

He looked up at me, his thoughtful eyes turning calm. "Oh no, Kaori-chan. I am a puppet; I do not need food."

Noticeably confused, everyone laughed at me. I hadn't expected an answer like that. His eyes were amused as he explained what has happened in his past. He was a self-made puppet, and that was very interesting to me.

Deidara was the last to finish his breakfast, and he placed his hand on my shoulder.

"We should probably get going. Hopefully we can find you some clothing to travel to the village in, un."

--

An hour later, I had chosen clothes similiar to those I had as a ninja: a short, black tank top, fishnet shirt, a skirt and knee length leggings. I changed at the store, grabbing my bags of clothes and essentials and walked out to find Deidara. His eyes went wide, and I laughed at him as he turned.

"What an outfit, un."

"This is how I dressed in Konoha. Besides, I have regular shirts and such in the bags, but it's hot. And I like showing off my stomach, thank you."

This was a true fact. My brother, Kakashi, had always cringed at my clothes ever since I graduated the academy. I enjoyed showing off my toned body, which showed the muscles of a good ninja. Besides, the pictures of our mother showed that she dressed similarly.

"What are you thinking about, un? You've been silent for longer than usual."

"Oh, my mother..."

"Do you miss her, un? I know it's hard to have to leave a village."

"Oh, I never knew her. She died giving birth to me. I'm an orphan, though I'm sure you know about my father."

"Konoha's White Fang, am I right, un? Commited suicide after being shunned by the villagers for abandoning a mission to save his peers."

I smiled sadly in response. My father had been a great ninja, and his life had ended too soon. I had nearly hated the village after that point, which was why I had no problem with the Akatsuki. I would've joined, except I didn't want to hurt Kakashi, my only surviving family member. He was the only thing I missed about the god-forsaken village.

--

The subject was changed, and soon we walked into the organization's hideout. Passing the living room as we walked, I heard a catcall and turned. Every eye was on me, and I felt slightly uncomfortable.

Hidan was the first to speak up. "Wow, hime. Flashy outfit, eh?"

"Hime? Itachi, what-" I was silenced by his gaze, telling me they hadn't gotten the nickname from him.

"That's what we decided to call you, Kaori. But what does Itachi have to do with this?" Kisame grinned, catching on to my mistake. Before I could answer, a monotoned voice answered for me.

"I called her that when we were children."

Everyone looked at the Uchiha, surprised etched onto their faces.

"Yeah, and I made you push me on the swing sets after school," I laughed, causing a faint smile to appear on his face. "Anyways, I'll go make lunch for you boys. Come to the kitchen in a half hour, and it should be done."

As we walked, Deidara looked slightly awkward. I looked at him with question in my eyes, and he shrugged.

"You wouldn't mind some help cooking, would you, un?"

"If you'd like to, you can help. Or you can just keep me company in the kitchen."

And this became my daily routine as maid of the Akatsuki, evil organization and my new family.


	3. Chapter 3

"Wake up, hime. I want to train with you today after breakfast, un."

I woke up lying on Deidara, as usual. We had gotten used to this, becoming best friends almost instantly with all the time we spent together. What surprised me was his request; no one had seen me train between breakfast and lunch. The only original, special move I had was the white light chakra sabre, passed down to my brother and I from father when we were younger. Most of my jutsu was based on lightning, also shared with my brother and father. Also, the other elements were easy for me to use. I was strong and intelligent, but I had no idea how to train with someone else. I preferred working on my own or with my brother, even during my genin days (which were short-lived, as I quickly moved through ranks).

My mind was changed after our training session. Deidara and I were almost on an equal level, and by the time we decided to call it quits, we were both drenched in sweat. Dodging his bombs were hard, and the intense heat left from them caused my reaction time to slow. But I was also very quick, and he had just as hard a time getting away from my attacks. Exhausted, I left the members to fend for themselves for lunch as I took a shower and relaxed.

My mind was on the change my life had gone through. Three weeks ago, I was walking back from a visit to Suna. I had met a girl named Temari on a mission there, and although she was a year younger than me, we became friends. Her father was the kazekage, and her brother Gaara was a container for the one-tailed demon. He had been kind to me though, which was shocking to the whole town. I remembered vaguely the fight that had resulted in my joining of the Akatsuki. I learned that there was a slim chance I could've beaten the 'zombie twins,' Kakuzu and Hidan, because they were both immortal. I also learned more about every member, except for Pein-sama and Konan. I rarely saw the two, but neither did the other members.

Deidara came out of the bathroom, black pants the only clothing he had on. I was used to this; he usually didn't wear a shirt to bed or when we were just hanging out in our room. The mouth on his chest was visible. It was one of his interesting features, along with the mouths on his hands which licked me when we were goofing off. This was actually how I discovered them, waking up to the feeling of a tongue on my waist. I had freaked out, waking Deidara up and causing him to laugh when I told him what happened.

His blonde hair was wet, reaching most of the way down his back out of its ponytail. He smiled when he saw me, jumping from the spot he was at to land beside me on the bed. We both laughed, used to the shenanigans of one another. We just layed there, talking about random subjects as usual, before I ran off for my daily talk with Sasori.

The redheaded puppet sat in his room, working on a puppet as he usually did. Everyday, I visited him and talked to him. He showed me how he made poisons, and I told him random stories about my father and childhood. We were both orphans, and part of our bond was the knowledge of that. His parents had been his first puppets; mine were buried in a Konoha cemetery. Sometimes I talked about training or Deidara, the latter subject always causing him to smirk. I wasn't sure why; the blonde was just my best friend... right?


End file.
